A little disappointed...

My HCG didn't make it in today...so I guess I'll see it on Monday. In a way, I can't wait to get started...and in another way, I really just have no idea what I'm going to eat. I guess I should be getting a grocery list started and stock up.

Hmmm, come to think of it, I should have thought about that before I went to Walmart a little while ago. And of course, I haven't eaten a thing all day so I went to the store STARVING. Bad idea! I spent $60 on groceries....and as I was unloading...I realized I bought mostly crap. I bought eggs, salsa, smoked turkey, sliced swiss and wheat bread...not too bad, right? But then I also found the Soft Batch chocolate chip cookies, Pringles chips, Mrs. Baird's cherry pies and chocolate donuts. Oh and don't forget the 20 Patio frozen burritos and the 1/2 gallon of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. Is this all stuff I can eat while loading? I hope so...because I look at it all and I think I may have more of a problem with food than I realize. *sigh... re-reading that really embarrasses me.

My eating habits are horrible. I'm unemployed at the moment so I don't work. I usually don't eat anything until about 6 or 7pm. Then, I will eat something resembling a dinner type meal...but definitely not a dinner type meal. I am partial to Kraft Spaghetti Dinner and Kraft Egg Noodle Chicken Dinner. I grew up eating these with my mother, so I guess there is a little comfort in eating them. Both come in a box like Mac and Cheese. Heck, they don't even sell the Egg Noodle Dinner in stores anymore. I bought a few cases from Amazon a few months ago and I only have 4-5 boxes left, I think. I haven't ordered more. I believe that each box is 1000 calories prepared, if I remember right. Each box is meant to be 3-4 servings...but I eat the whole box as a meal. Then a few hours later I will eat a whole pint of ice cream...and then maybe, I may eat some cookies or other junk, but not always.

If you're wondering, yes, my kids eat like crap too. The two youngest are off visiting family for the summer though...but when they're here, they eat cereal for breakfast and maybe sandwiches for lunch...and usually for dinner, I take them out. On the off chance they eat at home, they eat junk, like TV dinners, burritos or pot pies. I never have fruit and vegetables in my kitchen. This is something I want to change. I want the kids to learn how to eat. Pathetic thing is, I KNOW HOW (I even took a nutrition class in college) but I have yet to just do it.

I was brought up eating like this...and I have brought up my kids the same way, without meaning to. My 18 yr old could probably stand to lose 10 and my 12 yr old is skinny as a rail...but my son is 16 and he at 6'2", he weighs in at 265 pounds. He inherited his size from his dad but I played a part in alot of the excess. I am worried about him. I would like to see him at about 220. I don't even know what he is "supposed" to weigh though. I should look that up.

So anyway, believe it or not, I don't even buy soda and sweets for the kids...all that sweet crap is for me. Not eating on a schedule and eating processed meals is what my kids suffer from.

Man, the more I write the more I realize....I have a long way to go. I'm a mess.

Come on HCG....get here already!